So yesterday I got two personal progress goals done! One was a 10 hour project involving planning a youth activity involving standards (values we live by) from a book called For The Strength of Youth which I did a little less than a year ago but had to get signed off and one in a value called Good Works and it was #1. I had to notice quiet acts of service in my family for two weeks, record them and read some scriptures pertaining to service as well. So two down only 8 more to go! I also might finish another project this Friday. I am going to learn how to quilt a baby/lap blanket using a sewing machine and it will count as a 10 hour project for the young women value of Knowledge as long as it fulfills the 10 hours requirement of course. The next thing I wanted to talk about just my day in general yesterday. It was a little boring in the beginning because for most of the first part of my day I did math. Then I had to get ready to go babysit for a lady named Meredith. I was trying to see how long it would take to bike there and like a smart person I went in the rain... don't try to do that unless you have you because it was hard and I was soaked! Anyways what I do for Meredith is watch over her boys for about an hour or two sometimes three. I mainly help them finish homework do chores etc. before their mom comes home. Then I also babysat another a little boy around 5:30 named Graham for another family friend. He was really easy to babysit because he is like 4, I think? Mostly he just wanted to ride his bike, pretend we were super bunnies (we ran around with capes on, which was adorable) and we also watched max and ruby. Then I came home when his mom dropped me off. For a while I just kind of wound down for the day, cleaned up my room, got ready for bed because I had a class early in the morning. After I was already just to relax my sister decided that she wanted me to help her bleach her hair! She had looked up ways to do it correctly so that her hair didn't end up orange or any other colors that she didn't want. We used a cap and mixed the hair bleach and waited for about 40 min. After almost several heart attacks and worried looks later she took a shower and we decided to wait to for the morning for her to blow dry it so you will have to wait for my other post to see what happened!
Two other things that I was thinking about a lot yesterday was my parents and my relationship with them as well as my best friend, who is a guy, that I love very much. What I thought about was just how these two things can apply to life and actually what I wanted to share my thoughts on.
So here are my thoughts on my parents. Luckily for me, I have a fantastic relationship with my parents. Most teenager I talk to can't say this and it makes me kind of sad. Sometimes it's because parents are too strict too loose or are in the middle. It depends on your definition of strict, the parent child relationship and many other little details. So I decided to give out some advice for teens and maybe even parents when raising your kids, you can use it or just take it with a grain of salt whatever you want. It also could be different depending on the child and modify it as you want but these are things that I have realized have helped me and made me have a better relationship with my parents :)
Teens:
1. Always try to talk to your parents about things. The bad things, the good things, the sad things because usually if you find a time when they aren't busy they like to hear whats going on in your life. Communication is so important and the more you tell your parents about what is going on in your life the more they will trust you. They also will feel like you trust them as parents and they might be able to help you out. Try to be patient with them and don't lose your temper if possible.
2. Try to follow your parents rules and governmental laws. Yes, sometimes they might seem unfair or dumb but they have them because they love you and don't want to see you get hurt. If you really don't know why they have a rule ask them about it. You are also less likely to make really dumb mistakes because remember that they were once a teenager too and they might have been more like you than you think.
3. Always tell your parents where you are going, who you are with, and what time you are going to be home. Be as detailed as possible. If you tell them before they have to ask they are more likely to say yes.
4. If you are religious at all try to live it the best that you can. Even if you don't believe in it try it out instead of fighting it. It might surprise you and you will feel like its more your choice=Less rebellion and fights. IF you have actually tried it out and don't think its for you still follow it while in their house. Usually being in their house FOR FREE means their house, their rules.
5. Something good to remember is to look at all the the fun, amazing things you can do, or can drink or etc. instead of what you can't do. Often times when I have done that I'm a lot happier with my current situation and I get in less fights with my parents.
6. Ask your parents about their lives. It will show that you care about them too and it might make them ask things about you or show some interest. Plus you also might have something to talk about in the future. Always make sure to say I Love You because you never know what could happen and you should live life without regrets right? :)
I will let you know that I have done all of these things and let me tell you it has a ton of perks that go with it. Also remember this is coming from A SENIOR IN HIGHSCHOOL. So if you are anywhere around my age I am still a teenager. By the way here are some examples of perks you might get:
-If your parents enforce a curfew they might let you stay out a little later.
-You might be able to work out better compromises with your parents.
-You might be grounded less which means more phone time, more electronic time in general and more
friend time as well.
-Since your parents know whats going on in your life they might be more likely to not be calling you
every five seconds to see what is going on.
-Less likely to end up pregnant, a druggie, or many different things that as a teenager you shouldn't have
to face.
I know every situation is different but these are what have worked for me. I have escaped many unpleasant encounters with my parents and I have had more freedom. Also sometimes parents don't seem like they care or you can't go to them find someone that is an adult you can trust. That way you aren't going around blindly trying to figure things out and screwing up. Also remember that you do have to try and cooperate to make it work because like they say it takes two to tango, same with strengthening a relationship with my parents.
Parents:
1. Talk to your teen. Even if life gets busy take the time to talk to them one on one and check up with them. Ask about the fun stuff, the hard stuff. Ask about their friends, anyone they might like or things they might be struggling with. It shows them that you care and honestly who doesn't like to talk about themselves? they might be more willing to open up to you if you do.
2. Ask about the little stuff first and don't push too hard. Try to give advice on that little stuff. They might remember that good advice when the big stuff happens (or is about to happen) and go to you.
3. Make sure that you aren't judgmental and even if you don't agree about something listen first and give advice after or just show understanding. Sometimes teens don't want advice they just want someone to talk to about their problems and they can't go to their friends. When they make a mistake instead of freaking out try to be understanding because they might be more likely to come to you if that is your reaction.
4. Always let your kids know that mistakes are not failures and that they can try again. That they don't have to be perfect but it is good to try their best.
5. Try to always be your teens cheerleader because we do notice when you encourage us.
6. Soft words spoken can go a long way. Sometimes it will have a deeper impact than yelling. Also remember that if you do yell always let your teen know afterwards that you still love them. Make sure to say it because even if they kind of know it, its better to hear it out loud.
7. Let them know that even though they have grown up you still care as much as when they were little but let them know that you know that they are growing up too. Spend actual time with them still, invite their friends over. When they need their space make sure you give it to them because sometimes people just need that.
8. Love your spouse with all that you have. Sometimes the best thing you can do is what you actually do. It will show your kids how love works. For other things as well it will show them how to do things better than just telling them.
So, I do know that is a lot to live up to, but if you at least try it will make a difference. You aren't perfect either I know and your teenager probably knows that but we don't expect you to. We just want you to be our parents. I know that my parents doing these things has had a bigger impact on me than anything else has. I love them so much and I hope that I can be half as good as they have been as parents.
I'm sure that I could probably add more but I can't think of anything else right now... :) Also I will just tell about my friend Parker in another post I guess. This one is super long and I can't spend all my time on here. Anyways, those are my thoughts and some extra about my life. I will write soon!
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